Sunday, August 29, 2010

Manchester United vs West Ham

Loosing on the pitch
We are shit! I cannot believe how poor we are this season! Ok I would always kind of expect to be handed our arses against Man Utd, but to be three games in and not have a point - it is not looking good! And we struggled past Oxford United! We are shit!

Loosing off the pitch


So now both Daz and Gaz have collected the United shirt. I am still on 0 and Gaz is on 2 and Daz on 1. Butters of course is on 0. So we head up to Manchester for the game, didn't bother with the Oxford game, we all have money issues and that game just didn't seem worth the money. Luckily we were right. So we head up to Manchester, we are ok with the result; we got to see a great team play football (Manchester United not West Ham), and have a few pints. We each get a room in a near by Holiday Inn and we head into town. Trying to avoid the flourishing gay district of course! We all took some E, drank some vod-bulls and then headed to Sankeys, this club in Manchester. All fucked off our heads by 11pm. By midnight I was violently being sick. I was well in with this girl as well. We were proper pushed up against eachother type. My hand was running down her back and grabbing her hot, pert arse. She was running her fingertips up my shirt, feeling my abs. Our lips seemed to be in a constant embrace, except when broken by our tongues meeting. A few times she even ran her hand over my jeans to feel how hard she had got me...very!
I was proper loving it! Granted she was wearing a short, white dress with her tits hanging out, not a Manchester United or West Ham United shirt, but she was fit as fuck so fuck it!
Wasn't to be though. Some prick bashed into me and I banged against her elbow, she winded me and as I was already fucked I through up all over her white dress. She was not impressed. I then ran to the toilet and through up more, throwing up the whole time making my way there. It wasn't long before the bouncers came in, grabbed me and threw me out.

What made it worse is what Daz and Gaz were bragging about over our fry-ups the next day. Whilst I was throwing up on gorgeous women and then being unkindly escorted out the club, they were talking to two hot totties in United shirts. They had been at the game earlier apparently. The bastards only went back with them. Apparently fucked them in the same room, dirty Mancs! They were literally 4ft apart. Both claim to have not peaked over so no banter of poor performance as yet...sure all will be revealed in drunken futures though!

Still, gotta start catching up, gotta start fucking


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